Its official. I just became the last Queer persyn to see Brokeback Mountain. Not that i didn’t want to see it before, but that shit’s expensive. And i didn’t have anyone to go see it with me.

But in all honesty, i think the best thing i have to say about Brokeback Mountain is that i never really thought Heath Ledger was hawt until this movie. I think the anal sex really works for him.

I didn’t think it was all that bad of a movie. I just thought it was…ok. I’ve really enjoyed reading the critiques of Crash from One Tenacious Baby Mama, Reappropriate, and Angry Asian Man (why is it that these two movies always have to be pitted against each other as if they were inextractable and yet completely opposed). I certainly hear where they are coming from with regards to not only the shortcomings of Crash, but the complete miss of the mark. Granted, i’d rather the masses be talking about Crash (or even Brokeback Mountain) than some stupid fucking movie where some White guy like George Clooney plays some asshole who treats some womyn like shit because he can’t stand the fact that his dicks not up in her biz and the big plot twist is that through some act of fate, probably involving a child or an article of the womyn’s clothing, he realizes that he doesn’t hate her he actually loves her and all of a sudden he isn’t an asshole anymore even though he never actually changed and in the end he still just wants his dick rubbed. Well, now that i think about it, they aren’t really that different.

After watching Brokeback Mountain (having already endured every analysis my brain could withstand), i became very confused about a common theme in the Crash vs Cowboys discussions. That theme being that people felt that Crash contributed nothing to discussions on race while at least Brokeback showed what it was like to be gay in a homophobic society. I’d say that Brokeback contributes about as much to collective conciousness as Crash, if that. Don’t mean to be an ass, but what exactly did we learn from Brokeback? That if we let the closet door swing open too wide then we’ll end up in the middle of fucking nowhere like Matthew Shephard? Cuz i already learned that lesson… when it happened to Matthew Shephard.

And isn’t that all we’re talking about here? Gay White guys? Sorry, but i didn’t exactly see myself anywhere in this movie. I was glad to see the story of two working-class Queers. And what could be hotter than some assfucking in the Montana wilderness? But i found the account of gay cowboys to be even more enlightening when i read about it in a 50 cent copy of Gay American History that i got at a library book sale.

Just like Crash, this movie didn’t challenge anything other than the very narrow view that cowboys are “real men” not sissyfags. In no way did it really question homophobia other than showing homosexuality in a setting that we are already familiar with - hidden. Sure, i cried a little. Of course i did. I’m sick of fucking hearing about Queer people being murdered. It happens all the time, not just in the megaplex. And to be reminded of the constant threat that we live under brings great sadness to my soul. But the small amount of emotion sparked by this movie was dust in the wind compared to how debilitated i felt after watching Boys Don’t Cry. A movie that i found so powerfully debilitating that i seriously thought i was going to vomit. For two days i was nauseous. But hey, at least straight people can go see Brokeback and go back to there homes saying to themselves, “those poor people.” Thanks, but if anyone is going to throw a pity party for me, it going to be me, dammit!
But i wil say one thing. Brokeback didn’t make claims to challenge homophobia. It wasn’t meant to open our eyes to bigotry. It was meant as a beautiful love story. And that it was. Just because its love between two working men doesn’t mean it needs to be about somethig other than love.