I watched Havoc tonight. I had no idea what it was about when i picked it up, i just figured why the hell not. I tell ya, i sure did learn a lot from that movie. Here’s a brief summary:

Latino men are all:

• gang members
• crack dealers
• rapists
• covered in tatoos
• living in East Los Angeles
• “real”
• dangerous
• cheats
• scary, very scary. i just wet myself thinking about how scary they are. remind me never to go to East Los Angeles where all the scary tatoo’d latino rapists live.

But the movie wasn’t all about the big scary brown people. I also learned a good deal about rich White kids:

• they are the innocent victims of culture
• they form gangs because they have latchkey parents who don’t fuck enough (i’m googling between words to find out what a latchkey parent is)
• they aren’t “real”
• they aren’t very good at smoking crack, but that have found some very interesting ways to snort coke
• they can afford to be more ghetto than anyone else

um, that’s about all i learned about rich White kids. Although i did also learn that rich White bitches are the shit because they will suck your cock in the backseat of your car even though they would probably rather be bumpin nasties with your bestfriend’s bitch - you see, bitches are at least willing to fake the pleasure until you cum. Ahhh… young love.

Having watched this film i now feel a lot of pity for rich White kids. And i’m very scared of latino men (um, latina wha?). In fact, i’m so scared that i’m done typing. I have to go buy a gun from sketchy Eddie down the street so that i can get started on my tour of duty with the Minutemen (and i don’t mean that noisy punk band).