Not too long ago, Eric Stoller wrote a post about doing some shoe shopping with his partner, Wendy. In the middle of talking about cushion versus support, the salespersyn turns to Wendy and asks the loaded, “what are you?” Eric asked me awhile ago to add my two cents to the discussion, and, of course, i’m a little slow in doing so. Thankfully, however, there are plenty of other folks out there who jumped on it and have really done a great job.

Jenn at Reapproriate talks about how this question is a by-product of Othering:

The truth is that people of colour loathe the “what are you” question because it’s a reminder of the inequality we face inherent to our racial background. “What are you” suggests that we are not them, we are not normal, we are different. Though the White querient may believe the question is not harmful, they never consider how the very non sequitor nature of the question not only reminds us of our “Other”-izing but showcases the mindset of Whites who feel entitled to the knowledge.

Kevin at Slant Truth responds with a blunt, “I’m a fucking human being, that’s what I am.” Kevin’s answer quickly cuts to an undertone of the question: you aren’t a normal humyn, so what are you? Kevin points out that the question is used as a way to preface prejudice. Or as Kevin more eloquently put it:

You see, I’m a light-skinned black dude with high cheekbones, and while my hair is nappy as can be, I still ocassionally get the “what are you” question–meaning: you don’t look 100% Black 1 and so I can’t adequately judge you based on your race. I must know your racial background so that I can base your opinions (and other things like your shoe size 2 ) on everything you say adequately.

And last but not least, Mamita Mala responds with “as american as maiz y yuca.”

It’s the most dreaded question. “What are you?” It comes packaged with boxes to check, spaces to mark with an x, lines to fill in. Sometimes you are allowed to choose only one box, one label. Sometimes you get to be other.

I agree with what has been said. I believe the question to be a way to categorize and Other. I don’t believe its usually a conscious act on behalf of the questioner. Our actions and reactions are so thoroughly defined by prejudice that we feel the need to categorize people so that we may attach the proper prejudices and stereotypes upon them. But there is also more to the question, as the people i’ve listed have mentioned. The question is a way to remind those questioned that they aren’t “normal”.

As matt comments at Slant Truth:

i don’t think it would ever occur to me to ask a person something like that. “where does that name come from?” or, “how do you spell that?” those are questions i would ask. but “what are you?”?! seriously, get real and ask a question that matters, already.

Both Mala and Matt remind us that the question is huge in that it attempts to simplify and marginalize the individual. What are you is one of those questions that isn’t easily answered. That is, if the question wasn’t so racialized. How would the salespersyn have responded if Wendy answered, “oh, i’m a grad students. Why do you ask?” Would he become flustered that his racially coded language wasn’t properly decoded? Would there be a tinge of disappointment that people of color are more complex than their racial categorization? Or perhaps he’d actually recognize that not everyone fits in a tiny little box.

I can’t count how many times i’ve heard a White persyn ask a persyn of color the question, “what are you?” And like Eric, i’ve often been stunned by the question. That’s why i’m glad its been brought up, because this is one of those subtle things that people do over and over again without questioning it (and also something that White people seem to rarely or effectively point out).

Fighting racism doesn’t mean we have to properly respond to every single act. But i do believe that a very important part of the process is to further our (White people’s) consciousness about the many ways that our actions and words are racialized, so that we can stop these behavior patterns (and help others to stop them as well).

cross-posted at ally work